Iron Sharpens Iron
Proverbs 27:17 NASB
As iron sharpens iron, So one person sharpens another.
I have been mulling this over for a few weeks. It has come up several times in conversation and I believe the Lord would have us dive into this Proverb and gain deeper understanding.
What exactly does “iron sharpens iron” mean? This is a metaphorical statement that conveys to us that two people working together help each other improve. It can be applied to marriage, business, sports, and of course church.
Think of sharpening a knife. When a knife gets dull. It doesn’t cut very well. We then sharpen it so that it performs its function as intended. We have a sword of the Spirit which is the Bible. When we are getting dull, that means we are forgetting what the Bible says. It means we are losing battles because our sword is dull. When our brothers, sisters, spouses, parents, friends, or even bosses act as sharpening agents, they help us remember or learn what God said and encourage us to use our swords. They help us win battles because we are sharpened and we can function as God intended, destroying the work of the enemy.
Of course, for this to work the people involved must be willing to:
- improve.
- listen to constructive criticism.
- give constructive criticism.
- Study to show themselves approved.
The first thing is that we have got to want to improve. Many are happy with where they are at and have no desire to move beyond where they currently are. They choose to settle for “good enough” and refuse to work on continued growth and improvement. They have no desire to become excellent. A person that has no desire to pursue a more excellent way will not listen to constructive criticism. A person who is not willing to improve will not listen although they may very well be willing to give criticism. However, because they will not listen to constructive criticism their criticism is not always very constructive. Rather it becomes insulting or damaging or at the very least useless to those to whom they offer it.
For two people to engage in “iron sharpens iron”, both must be willing to improve, listen to and receive constructive criticism. There are many Proverbs in the Bible that talk about receiving instruction and being wise. It even says in Proverbs 1:7 Fools despise wisdom and instruction.
I interpret this as it being wise to engage in “iron sharpens iron” with others. A person who refuses to listen, learn and grow is actually a fool according to this Proverb. A wise person studies to show themselves approved. They seek out advice and are always listening and learning.
However, to give criticism it must be constructive and given with the right motive in love; otherwise, it may not accomplish the goal intended. Instead, it could make you an enemy or hurt the listener. We must guard our hearts against a critical spirit.
When establishing a relationship that will function correctly in “iron sharpens iron”, first the two must agree and choose to build on love. Unsolicited advice is often irritating. I myself have made the mistake of thinking that someone would be receptive to my advice and quickly learned that they did not appreciate my wisdom. Good communication skills are very helpful when giving constructive criticism or advice. I have learned that just because you know someone does not mean that they will want you to give them constructive criticism or advice.
I believe that “iron sharpens iron” is not the same as grating on someone’s nerves. Some people appear to believe that this is the case. They irritate you or insult you and throw out “Well, iron sharpens iron.” This is actually a misapplication of the phrase. What they fail to understand is that they are not sharpening anyone. Rather, they are more like nails on a chalkboard or like rubbing sandpaper on someone’s skin. Not pleasant at all.
The purpose of iron sharpening iron is to help each other improve, not make people mad. Even if they have the need for an area to be smoothed, correction is not what we are talking about here. If they have a teachable spirit, then someone with authority will be able to teach them. While teaching someone something may be part of it, teaching someone is not exactly the same as “iron sharpens iron.”
“Iron sharpens iron” is when two people are working together as a team to help each other accomplish a goal in the best way possible. It is recognizing when a teammate is becoming dull or less productive and helping them sharpen up. Part of that is education. Team members must be willing to learn to do what is necessary and this can be in many different areas.
Now we understand that to engage in an “iron sharpens iron” relationship, there must be a purpose, a goal that they are working towards together. A vision for where they are going. Then they help each other get there.
This may mean improving attitude, health, or understanding of certain concepts. It will involve encouraging each other to grow in all areas…physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual. It may involve learning a new skill. However, if we have someone who will walk the walk with us, we will improve. We will grow. We will reach our goals and fulfill our destinies together.
“Iron sharpens iron” is not criticizing people and expecting them to take it. It is genuinely loving another enough to help them and that person loving themselves enough to accept the help, and then reciprocating. It is establishing a partnership that benefits both parties involved and blesses the community around them.
I hope this has helped you to understand what “iron sharpens iron” means a bit better and how to properly apply it. Let’s help each other grow and reach our goals while avoiding becoming an irritation rubbing others the wrong way. Irritating each other will not sharpen anyone, except maybe giving them a sharp tongue to rebuke you. We want to be a winning team reaching our goals and fulfilling our destinies, so let’s walk in love, truly engaged in relationships where “iron sharpens iron.” Let’s help each other sharpen our swords and destroy the works of the enemy. Amen?
Shalom, dear ones.